THE LIFE OF THE PARTY

So we went out last night. We got slizzard.lmao I thought I was drunker than someone else but apparently not! But I'm not even gonna talk about that. Anyway, there's a certain promoter that I've known for years who keeps threatening me with his penis. I'm tempted to take him up on his offer but I don't like his chest hair and I think that I would be tempted to yank out each pubic like strand while doing the deed. I know that he is packing from fondling in the past....like ten year ago fondling, but nevertheless (is that a word?) we fondled and I was afraid of large penises back then. If he shaved his chest, I might hit that but I think he thinks it's sexy......Bwhahahaha. Anyway, the usual suspects were in the building aka The Redskins. They make me so mad sometimes. Don't get me wrong I'm all about my hometeam and we even saw some of the guys we're cool with but sometimes I just wanna yank them all up and say "WHEN YOU MOTHERFUCKER'S GET ON A WINNING STREAK THEN YOU COME FUCK AROUND IN THE CLUB, UNTIL THEN STAY YO ASSES IN THE HOUSE AND WATCH SOME REELS! So anyway, a certain cutie-patootie married player was giving me the eye and then he made his way over to me and flirted...I think. I never know about these things but I digress, he came over and flirted (I think), I smiled and continued partying in my own little Patron Margarita induced haze. The big homey told me I was crazy and I should've said something to him. Whatevs. I'm not really kicking myself because he's a married dog...woof woof. He needs to go flirt with his damn playbook....